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Relationship Elements

The Four Elements of Healing is a powerful paradigm for guiding us through life to create deeper and more meaningful relationships with ourselves and with others.

The Elements; Courage, Trust, Respect and Love provide us with a way of being, of understanding, and acting to bring depth and satisfaction to our day to day lives and relationships. Whether we are beginning a relationship, in the middle of an existing relationship or ending one, the four elements of healing can guide our way.
We already know the elements of healing; they resonate in our hearts. They are simple, common sense concepts but their simplicity is deceptive. We need to be reminded daily to act with courage in the face of our fears, to trust our ourselves and learn how to trust others, to respect our own path and the paths of others and to love like we have never been hurt.

Courage (earth):
Part of healing is to understand our own fears, the role fear plays in our lives and how our imagined fears might keep us from becoming fulfilled.

Trust (water):
Trust is elemental to any relationship. When trust is broken, the relationship is broken and needs to be repaired if possible. We need to learn how to trust ourselves-our intuitions, ideas and values before we can place our trust in others.

Respect (air):
Establishing boundaries is a necessary stepping stone to developing intimate relationships. Difficulties can arise in relationships, however, when boundaries are rigidly upheld at the expense of change and growth.

Love (fire):
When we act with love and compassion we act in a way that maintains the integrity and respect of others and ourselves. Many of us have learned to live our lives according to expectations. As a result we do not love what we are doing nor are we at peace with the compromises we have made. We need to experience love, to be compassionate, and to find the passion living a life fulfilled.

Used as touchstones to navigate our daily lives, to confront and meet the challenges that face us and the conflicts that test us, the Four Elements of Healing assist us in fostering inner peace and serenity. Not a peace and serenity brought about through repression and denial, but an authentic joy in living life to its fullest potential.


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